Take 2 - PhoBlo Days, Day 1

The pictures have worked today, so without further ado, we join our day already in progress:

I had forgotten that Friday was Day 1 of the Winter Edition of PhoBlo Days until the boys were leaving for school:



The Princess was crushed that they were leaving:

She enjoys making silly faces for the camera:



Buh-bye boys, we'll miss you:



Because I was SO sure that Friday was going to be a snow day, what with the 'snowicane' they were predicting and all, I stayed up until midnight doing bookwork. And since there was no snowday in sight, I could barely drag my butt out of bed at 7:00 am. Hence the shower after the children were gone:



Ahhhhh, a little bit of Heaven on earth:



9:00 am and it's time to start my workday:



The commute was only the length of a hallway, but there was traffic stopped in odd places:



Princess Thumbelina was upset at me because I had to work...and because I kept taking her picture...so she drew pictures. The angry picture is of a little girl who was mad because her mom put milk in her cereal...it's a self-portrait of sorts:



Mr. Happy was remote-desk-topping me to the church computer so that I could do the T-4's for the staff. Nuthin like waiting until the last day to get it done:



Princess Thumbelina was busy with her office work as well:



Then it was time to go to the church and hand out the T-4's...this was my commute into town:



Our destination:



And a quick stop to mail some letters:



And another quick stop at my favourite store to buy some cute push-pins:



Home again:



With my office assistant ready and willing to do all he can to help:



But first, an afternoon coffee is top priority:



Both of my helpers busily doing their things:



4:00 pm and the boys are home from school:



And it suddenly occurs to me that I forgot to eat lunch:



Shaggy & Thumbelina go out to enjoy the snow:





While I check on my farm at Farmville:



A healthy supper from Little Ceasar's that Mr. Happy brought home for the children (he brought us home some rice bowls from Boston Pizza):



After supper, I practiced singing...mostly because I was procrastinating about cleaning up the kitchen from supper...



Because I am old (no, really, I am), and I can no longer handle staying up until midnight, I collapsed on the couch to watch some TV:



Thumbelina insisted that we watch one of her shows...this particular show is called In The Night Garden and it put both Mr. Happy and I to sleep. As a result, Thumbelina got to stay up an extra half hour:



After the children went to bed, we watched the Canadian women's curling team get silver and the Canadian men's hockey team win against somebody...Slovakia? Yes, Slovakia, and now they are in the finals for the gold. Against the US. It will be like watching Saturday night hockey on a Sunday afternoon:



Oh, and I stayed up until midnight for the second night in a row. Mostly because of blogger not cooperating. Stay tuned for Day 2 of even more exciting times!!

A Day in the Life

It's been so long since I've blogged that I'm not sure if I even remember how to do it. It is the winter edition of PhoBlo days, so I thought I'd let you take a peak into my life...or rather peak at a day of my life. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

And to be honest with you, blogger is being as much a poo-poo head as I remember. It is not navigating to the 'add pictures' page and then it keeps losing it's connection with the dashboard.

You know what frustrates me, other than blogger? People. Shocking, isn't it. In our local Superstore, they have changed the check-outs. After your food is scanned, the conveyor belt divides into two lanes...so that two people can be bagging their groceries at the same time. But if the lady in front of you has her groceries on the farther belt and continues to stand in the middle of the check-out aisle so that there is no room for you...or your cart...then it's a waste of space and energy to have two conveyor belts.

And then when you leave the store with your cart and there's a car parked where it is clearly a no-stopping zone and only a walk-through for grocery carts and the people pushing them, what is one to do? Ram into the said car with your grocery cart? Or telepathically send mean messages to the driver?

Frustrating.

As is blogger. No pictures today.

Do They Do It On Purpose?

Do people irritate me on purpose? Are they trying to make their point that I am demanding and a perfectionist? Is it too much to ask to do your job decently and in order? Are you wondering what on earth I'm talking about??

A couple of weeks ago, I let my 3rd office helper go. Actually, Mr. Happy fired her for me...I'm not sure I would have been entirely pleasant during the process. She told Mr. Happy that she enjoyed working for him...notice she didn't say "Jaj" or "You and Jaj"... anyway, she wasn't very bright. Not very bright at all. When I interviewed her, she assured me that if I needed anything from a file, she could find it. Um, no, she couldn't. And now I can't find anything she's filed either. I let our bookkeeper go in May because she wasn't doing things how we needed them done, plus she charged $26.00/hour. We weren't getting our money's worth. So I tried to train the other assistant in all things bookkeeping. It just wasn't working out. She would put the Invoice Number in the Amount Due spot...use commas instead of decimals...little things that have a big impact. Whenever I pointed out her mistakes to her, she would giggle and say, "Oh! Not as many mistakes as last week!" I was wasting my time going through all of her entries and pulling out ones that were wrong and it was making me very frustrated and angry towards her.

Now that I'm back to doing everything myself, I am no longer frustrated. I still have the occasional bouts of anger...like today...when she was still working for me I had to ask her not to file things upsidedown. One wouldn't think that one would have to be told something so simplistic as to lay papers on top of each other facing the same direction, but apparently one does.

It takes a special kind of stupid to consistently file papers upsidedown and to be so inconsistent in office procedures. Or else she just did it to irritate the snot out of me. Which definitely worked. Because I am now snotless.

What Is It?

So I'm sitting here, reading Catherine's wonderful news, when Thumbelina comes running into my office yelling, "Mom! I made something for you!" She is playing with PlayDoh. As she thrusts a yellow gob of doh into my hand she asks me, "What is it?" What is it indeed. To a three-year-old it could be anything.

I tentatively answered, "A candy?"

Disgustedly, she looked at me, took the shape of Play Doh back, and said, "I go make you a diamond." Aha, it was a square!

The next thing I know, Thumbelina is back, giving me a diamond-shaped piece of Play Doh and asks, "What is it?"

Smiling, I answered, "A diamond!"

I can almost see her rolling her eyes as she answers, "No!" And then she rolls it into a ball and says, "It's a circle."

Well of course it is. Next time I'm just going to say, "It's a quadrilateral."

Happy Spring Break!

It's Spring Break here at the Funny Farm, which means I don't have to make lunches this week. Or make sure the kids are wearing matching clothing. Wahoo! The weather was so nice yesterday that the boys were outside in shorts and t-shirts. SO nice.

And I actually thought of something to blog about, but that was before I got out of bed. Now I've been up for a couple of hours and life has taken over and my blogging mind is empty again. Maybe it will come to me later on today.

In the meantime, we are all doing well. Last week we celebrated our 2nd Thumbelina Day. It has been an amazing two years. She is actually starting to kiss us on the cheek!! We get so giddy when she does. She is still very good at bossing around her brothers and for the most part they do what she says. Which I find hilarious.

I guess it's a good thing that I have nothing of interest to blog about, right? It means life is good. Right?? Or am I just excrutiatingly boring??? Don't answer that.

What Really Bugs Me

You know what really bugs me? At least today? Because there are way too many things to mention in just one little post...but what really bugs me is when parents blame your kids for their own kid's irresponsibility.

Case in point - yesterday morning as I was dropping off the kids at school, a fellow mom came up to my window and asked me if Shaggy had her kid's shoes. I'm thinking to myself, "Why would Shaggy have Auhsoj's shoes?" I was a little confused, so she explained that Auhsoj can't seem to find his shoes (the classrooms and hallways at school are carpeted, so each kid is required to have indoor and outdoor shoes). She went looking for the missing shoes and saw a pair on Shaggy's chair at his desk and she thought they belonged to her son. I said, "But the boys aren't even in the same classroom." We called Shaggy over to the van and asked him if he had Auhsoj's shoes. He just looked at me like I was a little wobbly on the brain and said no, he had his own shoes. So Auhsoj's mom wanted to know what size shoe Shaggy wore - turns out it's the same size as her kid - but Shaggy's shoes are brand new - we bought them during Christmas break - and he told Auhsoj's mom that his shoes are brand new and still clean whereas Auhsoj's are older and dirty. And her response? "Well, what's Auhsoj supposed to do?" What is Auhsoj supposed to do?? Find his own stupid shoes. That's what he's supposed to do. I told Auhsoj's mom that I'd look around at home, but I didn't think we had any extra shoes lying around.

So this morning, I overheard two teachers talking, and they said that Auhsoj found his shoes in the boot rack where the boots are kept. And where shoes are not to be kept. Grrrr.

You know what else really bugs me? Other people's kids. Other people's kids who are rude and mean. Not just to my kids, but to every single kid at school. For the past two days I have had the privilege of driving home other people's kids. Other people's kids who are rude and mean. This kid will say things like, "You're nothing but a pile of dirt. You're mud. You eat mud." This is hurtful to other children. When other people's kids are in my care, they adhere to the same rules that my kids adhere to, so I reminded the Mean Kid that, "We only use nice words." And then he tries to twist what he has said, "I didn't mean it like that...you know...Adam was made from dirt, so we're all just dirt." And the things he says to his sister. Goodness. There is sibling bickery and then there is no regard or respect for the opposite sex. This kid scares and worries me.

And I hate having to tell my kids to stay away from certain kids, but I do tell them to stay away from the Mean Kid. Life is hard enough without some little creap trying to knock you down with words.

Pictures

Okay, so Alfred's Mom asked for updated pictures of Thumbelina, and who am I to say no to such a request??

Just before Christmas, Thumbelina got her first ever haircut...first ever since being home in the Great White North and part of the Funny Farm Clan. I kept putting it off because I think long hair is adorable on little girls...except Thumbelina's hair wasn't looking adorable, it was looking messy and scraggly. She had at least 2 haircuts while at the orphange, and I use the term loosely...her first one was pretty much a shave-job and her second one was more of a hack job. But I have since learned that the reason Chinese people shave their babies heads (boys and girls) is because they believe this will help their hair to grow in thicker. Thumbelina has pretty thick hair, so maybe it's true.

Anyway, here she is looking very uncertain:

Some parts of her hair had 3" cut off...other parts had 1/2 - 1" taken off:

Isn't she just beautiful?? I had my hairdresser trim up her bangs, because that bunch of hair always falls down on her forehead and looks messy:

And then she got some curlies put in as well:
I think Mr. Happy better dust off his gun pretty soon:

New Year's Quiz

It's already the end of the 2nd week of this New Year, but this quiz looked fun.

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?
My girlfriend and I were trapped on an airplane with irrate and drunken passengers, we were diverted to a couple of different airports and had to spend the night in New Jersey before we were able to get home, due to inclement weather on the eastern seaboard.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don't usually make resolutions because I don't usually keep them.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
My cousin had a surprise baby in August.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
My girlfriend's Mother passed away in October. I wasn't close with her Mother, but I'm close with my girlfriend; another friend's baby died after bravely living for 16 days.

5. What countries did you visit?
USA

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
Extra money, completely organized home, more patience

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
March 12 was our one-year Family-versary when Thumbelina joined our family

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Figuring out that I'm allergic to gluten and that maintaining a gluten-free diet cures me of all arthritis pain

9. What was your biggest failure?
Eating gluten at Christmas...like a moth to the flame...

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Yes...nearly breaking my butt when I fell down the stairs...but after that I was much more careful

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Washer & Dryer - it holds 3x the amount of clothes that my old set could handle, and my landry is all caught up. All of it. All.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Zoomer - he's always been a good kid, but after the mission's trip he went on last summer, things changed in a positive way with him

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Somebody's

14. Where did most of your money go?
We were able to pay off quite a chunk of our bank loan from when we bought our new-to-us vehicle and from our trip to China...we should have the balance paid off by June

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Thumbelina taking an interest in potty-training

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
I don't know

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder?b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer?

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Taken the time to just have fun

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Worrying

20. How did you spend Christmas?
Home. With sick kids.

21. Did you fall in love in 2008?
Well, I'm already in love...and I didn't fall out of love...

22. What was your favorite TV program?
Divine Design, Moving Up

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Hate is a useless emotion

24. What was the best book you read?
The Good Earth

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
That Tigger truly is really awful on the recorder

26. What did you want and get?
A day at the spa

27. What did you want and not get?
A vacation

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
I'm so behind I have no idea what films were new...I did watch The Notebook and loved it

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Oooo, my birthday was fun - Husband took me to the city and I spent my day at the spa with my girlfriend. I was 39. There, I said it. 39. And then we went out to a fabulous steak place.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
If my kids could understand the concept of doing homework and not complaining

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
Same as 2007

32. What kept you sane?
God

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I only fancy Husband

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
All politicians are crooks and only have their own agenda in mind...the downfall of the economy was something I didn't see coming

35. Who did you miss?
I wish I could see more of my girlfriend in the city

36. Who was the best new person you met?
I'm not sure I met anybody new this year

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
Don't let the immaturity of other's bring you down. Life is too short to try to make everybody happy, and you can only do what you can do.

Irritations

There are quite a few things that irritate me. And it is mostly people and what they do or do not do.

Today is a snow day (yay) and our school has decided to implement a new system, in that most people are given the names of 2 families that they must call if there is ever a cancellation. It starts with the principal who calls two assistants, who call two teachers, who call two families, and it trickles on down the line.

I am not a morning person by any definition of the word, but I do get up by 6:30 every morning. And by get up, I mean sit up in bed and try to read my Bible for 15 minutes with only one eye open. And then I get up and do laundry until it's time to start waking the children. Everybody is up and eating breakfast by 7:20 and we try to start leaving the house for school by 8:10.

So this morning, at 6:30 am, there were no school cancellations reported on the radio. I modified my morning and did some extra reading and lounging, and by 7:00, all the schools were cancelled. Which I'm not sure of the purpose of calling all the families because it's always been the rule that if the public schools are cancelled, our school will be cancelled too, but it is what it is.
I got up and enjoyed my morning coffee in quiet while I e-mailed my girlfriend, and I received my phone call at 7:22 am. So I called the two families on my list. Except the first family didn't answer the phone and there was no answering machine picking up so that I could at least leave a message. I called every 15 minutes for the next hour, and I think I got the mom out of bed. At 8:30 in the morning.

People, if you know it's a snow day, and you know you're going to be getting a phone call about it, PLEASE don't go back to bed until you've at least received your phone call. It's irritating for the caller and makes them feel strapped to the phone.

That's all for today...stay tuned because I'm sure I will have more irritations to share with you.

A Pointless Post

Well I didn't actually have time to eat any fudge yesterday, and I'm in a much better mood today. MUCH better. Which is very bizarre, because the more that I think about it, maybe it was the fudge that caused my mood to crash so drastically. Shaggy has the same reaction when he eats chocolate or eggs or anything with preservatives. Which is really a bummer because I still have fudge leftover.

I just had some gluten-free pizza for lunch and it's leaving a weird aftertaste in my mouth. Hard to describe, other than it's not very pleasant. I bet some fudge would wash the taste away.

So. As you've noticed, I've got nothing of substance to talk about.

The Princess is awesome. Even when she's hard to get along with, she's still awesome. She's funny. Once she hits her point of extreme tiredness, she is soooooo difficult to get along with. We struggled through lunch today because nothing was good enough. Thumbelina is a picky eater, so I offer her a variety of foods and hope for the best. Today's entree was a yogurt tube. Except I gave her the blue one, and she wailed because it wasn't the colour she wanted. She was tired, so I gave in and gave her the pink one. And then she wailed because it made a mess on the floor. Next on the menu was a cheese string. And she wailed because the first one broke. Again, because of her tiredness, I gave in and gave her a new one. And then she wailed because she threw it on the floor. Dessert was pudding. She wailed because I put the spoon into the pudding before I brought it to her. So I took the spoon out and gave her a new spoon so that she could put it in herself. And then she wailed because she spilled pudding on her shirt. But she was happy happy to go down for her nap and she is quiet now, so all is well in our world. I find her behavior amusing.

Alright, so I've bored myself to tears with all of this jarble, so I am signing off for today.

What Happened to September?

Hey Readership, how are you? What's up? What's new? Lookin' great, milkshake!

Have you ever been extremely crabby, with no apparent reason for your crabbiness? That's the state I'm in today. And it's Thanksgiving, no less. So, I'm thankful that I have children with which to be crabby at. Oh, is that not how giving thanks is supposed to work?

Okay, then. I am thankful that my homework-induced stress headaches are gone. We still have quite enough homework coming home, some of the children are not doing the best in their classes, but the 4:00 -bedtime headaches are gone. Funny, that.

So, yes. School is going okay. And I find myself in shock that 6 weeks have already gone by and our first 4 day weekend is now at an end. Which reminds me, I need to make lunches for tomorrow and pack up backpacks, and do all the fun stuff that is my life.

I am thankful for gluten-free fudge. I've been recently 'diagnosed' with having celiac disease. 'Diagnosed' meaning the doctors I have been to said, "Well, it sounds like celiac to me." It's a hard disease to diagnose if you are not consuming gluten in your diet. Which I am not. And I am not willing to eat gluten just to get a positive test result.

I am thankful for the new girl who is working in my office, who takes instruction without huffing and getting all snotty, and who really knows her stuff.

There are a lot more things I am thankful for - such as the both of yous who take the time to stop by and read my ramblings - but now I need to bathe my two-year-old beauty. And eat my gluten-free fudge.

Barnyard Ramblings

So I have this coffee mug. With my name on it. And I thought I would take it to the barn because whenever I go to make myself a cup of coffee, there are never any clean mugs available. And me, being all innocent and naive-like, honestly thought that the people at the barn wouldn't touch a coffee mug that says JAJ, especially since I'm the only JAJ that works there. At the barn.

Oh how wrong I was, dear readership.

Today when I went to the barn, I was really in the mood for a cup of coffee. And so I went in search of my JAJ mug. And it was nowhere to be found. Suspicious. Maybe there is a coffee mug thief, I thought. So when a bunch of the crew came up to the kitchen for their break, I went and asked, to no one in particular, "Has anybody seen a mug with JAJ on it?"

Says the guy who is bi-polar: Oh, yeah, it broke about two weeks.

Me: It broke?? My mug broke??

BPG (Bi-Polar Guy): Yeah, like two weeks ago. But it wasn't me.

Me: And when was somebody going to tell me it broke?

BPG: When you asked about it.

Meanwhile in the background, the guy who two weeks ago told me I look much more beautiful in the barn, kept saying, It broke? Such a shame. For today's story, let's refer to him as Guy Who Needs Glasses, or GWNG for short.

BPG: It was that Hershey's one right? I guess I'll have to get you a new one.

Me: You'll have to get it from Pennsylvania because it came from Hershey's Chocolate World.

Such a shame it broke, mumbles GWNG.

GWNG: How long have you had it?

Me: I got it when I was 12 years old.

GWNG: 12 years old! Such a shame.

Me: I dog-sat a family's dog, and they brought me back the mug.

GWNG: Such a shame. 12 years old.

BPG: 12 years old, that must have been what - 8 years ago?

GWNG: 12 years old. Such a shame.

Me: You're right! It was 8 years ago.

GWNG: Such a shame.

How can I stay mad at BPG when he so sensitively guessed my age? So I guess that only means one thing - ROAD TRIP - to get a new coffee mug, of course.

And yah, by the GWNG kept mumbling such a shame, I'm guessing he knows who broke my mug and was trying to guilt the guilty party into buying me a new one, or else he's the guilty party and was just trying to throw suspicion off of himself.

Camping, Jaj Style

So last week was my birthday, and in honor of me turning one year older...but feeling slightly less mature...Mr. Happy decided that the two of us should go on a little camping trip together.


Keeping our campsite a surprise, I was delighted to find out that we would be pitching our tent here. Mere feet away - FEET, I tell you - from this magnificent wonder of God's beautiful creation. I truly appreciate the small pleasures in life. Some good friends of ours, who make their abode not too far from where our tent was, treated us to dinner. They sure know how to make the most of a campfire!


The next day, being the anniversary of my birth and all, Mr. Happy sent me on a little adventure of my own. Thrilling and exciting does not even begin to describe my day, made even better because my good friend was able to join me. Again, it's about appreciating the little things in life. Because we had been roughing it for the past 24+ hours, Mr. Happy decided to take me out to dinner. It was not busy. In fact, I think we were the only patrons in the whole establishment, therefore our maitre d', who also served as our waiter, hung around our table...just out of eyeshot but definitely within earshot...and listened to our dinner conversation. And every time he left the room, Mr. Happy or I would sneak over to his station and help ourselves to the candy that was set out in his giant candy jar. What?! It was going to go stale if we didn't eat it! Anyway, after dinner, I enjoyed walking through the magnficent wonder that was mere feet from our campsite, and I just appreciated the beauty for all it is.

So the following day was when we had to pack up and head back home. I wanted to share the awesomeness with Mr. Happy of the magnificent wonder that was mere feet from our campsite, so that is how we spent our morning. On our way home, we stopped here, because really, it was still my birthday week. Why do the celebrations have to end just because the day has ended? Anyway, all I can say is that it's a good thing we had the pick-up truck with us.

There you have it, camping Jaj style. And I can't wait for our next trip!

They All Look the Same

Today I was working at the barn. In my job, I don't have a lot of opportunity to interact with the other staff...except for Lola of course...because Lola and I are mostly in the office while the rest of them are out in the barn. But parts of my job do require me to head out into the barn, and there I see my co-workers.

I should mention that the pigs in our barn are extremely healthy, and it's because we are required to shower at the barn...before we are allowed to enter...and to shower when we leave. And healthy pigs are what our customers want. There are 4 showers (one for the ladies), so up to 4 people can shower at a time. On the inside of the barn, we are given generic t-shirts and shorts to wear; there are a couple of washers and dryers there as well, so barn clothes stay inside our securely healthy facility. Just bear with me, you needed to know this.

At the barn we have a cultural mix of people working. Three are from the Caribbean, 1 is from Mexico, 1 is from Denmark, and I'm pretty sure the rest of us are from the local area.

So.

As I was leaving this afternoon, there were 3 of us in the shower (3 separate showers, people! Get your mind out of the gutter!), and I could tell the other two were some of our Caribbean Crew (they call themselves the Caribbean Connection) because of their singing. They have the rhythm and it's really fun to watch them just break out in song wherever and whenever they feel like.

As I'm leaving the change room, I saw the other two guys in the entryway, getting ready to leave as well. The one guy looked at me and said, "Were you just in there?" I was a little confused because I've had at least 3 separate conversations with this particular fellow just this afternoon. And so I asked, "In the shower?" And he, looking confused said, "No, were you just in the barn?" And I said, "Yes."

The other guy who was with him said something, but all I caught was "Lola." Maybe they thought I was Lola??? The other guy has a very thick accent and I have a hard time understanding what he says, so I usually just laugh and nod. Mr. Happy says that he smiles and says yep, and then bangs fists with him...not really knowing what they just talked about...

So back to the first guy. He said to me,"That was you in the barn? You're much more beautiful in there."

O-kaay. Um. So have I just been complemented or insulted? I can't imagine I'm very attractive in the barn...wearing the same t-shirt and shorts that everybody else wears...with my hair flat and straight and my bangs hanging in my eyes, because unlike some former employees, I don't feel the need to blowdry and curl my hair and apply make-up before I start my shift. Anyway, it was just an odd conversation.

I guess white people do all look the same.

Always Wear Clean Underwear

You know how when you were a teenager and you were just about to leave the house to go out with friends, and your mom would say to you, "Are you wearing clean underwear?" and you'd roll your eyes...much like you're doing now...and sigh and say, "Y-es!" And then your mother would say, "Because if you're in an accident you should be wearing clean underwear." And again you'd roll your eyes...(I'll let you finish)...as you left the house.

Well.

To the lady who was at Shopper's Drugmart holding up the line because she kept buying lotto tickets, PLEASE! For the love of all things chocolate! Wear some underwear!

I jest not.

She was a little large and was wearing a pair of shorts that were jogging pants material, and when she bent over and leaned against the counter, her cheek was exposed. And not the cheek attached to her face, either. I didn't know whether to laugh or throw up. A lady who was in line a few people behind me, said to her husband, "And here I thought I looked a mess coming into the store wearing this!" There was no mistaking who the comment was intended for. But the Lotto Lady was too intent on buying more tickets.

So, dear readers, if you're not going to wear clean underwear, at least wear underwear. Please. For the rest of humanity. And for those stuck behind you in line at Shoppers Drugmart.

How To Really Tick Off Your Teenager - 101

Lesson 1 - Send him to camp. But make sure it is an over-night, week-long camp with all his buddies, filled with energetic activities where your teenager is guaranteed a maximum of 6 hours sleep each night. Give or take.

Lesson 2 - Don't make him take a nap on Sunday afternoon to catch up on his sleep.

Lesson 3 - Give him chores to do.

Lesson 4 - Give his leftover pizza pockets, which have been sitting out on the kitchen counter for 2 1/2 hours, to his little brother.

Lesson 5 - Give the easy chores that your teenager is grumbling about to his little brother, and appoint harder chores to your teenager to do. This one was his grandfather's suggestion...to give said little brother a turn to cut the grass. I didn't want you all to think that we were giving the teenager harder chores to do...such as using the push mower...because he was grumbling about cutting the grass. But now that I think about ....

Lesson 6 - Sit back and enjoy the fireworks.

Close Only Counts in Grenades

So last week, Thumbelina and Shaggy were standing at the dining room window watching the lightening as a storm was moving into our area. And somehow, Thumbelina managed to knock down the curtains. And bend the rod. They were so outdated - lacy balloons with a valence. They've been in my window for 13 years. It was definitely time for a change.

And then Thumbelina said to me, "Uh-oh, what Shaggy do?" Heh. My girl already knows who to blame.

So this weekend, I patched the holes from the old curtain rod, because the new curtains I bought are not the same style, hence there is a new rod with different holes. And the white from the patching looked terrible with my green walls. I managed to find the old can of paint from when the room was painted 4 years ago...and it was solid as a rock. Rock solid. Very solid. Solid. So then I had had this brilliant plan to go through my craft paint and mix colours together to come up with the shade of green currently on my walls. I came close. Zoomer said to me, "Close only counts in grenades. And horsehoes." I wish he would have said something before I painted it.

It is hideous.

It is true - close only counts in grenades.

This Child Needs More Supervision

Hey Mom! I was colouring!
Ooooh, I wonder how it got on my foot?
You have your camera? Sure, I'll say Cheese!
Hey, take a picture of my Fish Face!
I just find it all so shocking.

There's a Squash in My Purse

This was the scene in my driveway at 7:00 this morning when I got up. Makes you go Hmmmm, doesn't it. Yes, dear readership, we had another break-in. The thieves were smarter this time than they were the last time. So the quad was stolen, as were 3 chainsaws, many tools, a laptop, possibly Shaggy's bike...he said he put it away beside Zoomer's bike and now it's gone...Zoomer's bike is still here...at least they didn't take Thumbelina's bike:
Shaggy fixed it up and painted it for her. She loves it. Forensics was even called. And then Shaggy went out with his CSI kit after they left looking for footprints and fingerprints. He found lots.

Meanwhile, our Pal left his truck at a dining establishment in town over night because he went home with his girlfriend. This morning his truck was out of gas. Empty. As in not a drop left. And he didn't leave it that way.

Wednesday night at church, our pastor was giving away produce from his garden, so I took home a squash. And put it in my purse. And then Zoomer and I went to the grocery store...with a squash in my purse...I was actually quite nervous that a grocery store employee would notice it and report me. Could you just picture the headlines? Local Woman Arrested for Pursing Produce Oy. Zoomer thought I was over-reacting. We didn't get caught. And the next time I go to the store, I'll try to remember to leave the squash in the truck.

So You Know It's Not Always About Me...

Melvinette seems to be having some issues, as is a bit obvious by her comment left on yesterday's post. You need some stronger meds, girl! Or a straight-jacket. So Melvinette, this is for you, so you know the blog isn't always about me...although it is my blog...

This is why we only use Colour Wonder markers: