So I have this coffee mug. With my name on it. And I thought I would take it to the barn because whenever I go to make myself a cup of coffee, there are never any clean mugs available. And me, being all innocent and naive-like, honestly thought that the people at the barn wouldn't touch a coffee mug that says JAJ, especially since I'm the only JAJ that works there. At the barn.
Oh how wrong I was, dear readership.
Today when I went to the barn, I was really in the mood for a cup of coffee. And so I went in search of my JAJ mug. And it was nowhere to be found. Suspicious. Maybe there is a coffee mug thief, I thought. So when a bunch of the crew came up to the kitchen for their break, I went and asked, to no one in particular, "Has anybody seen a mug with JAJ on it?"
Says the guy who is bi-polar: Oh, yeah, it broke about two weeks.
Me: It broke?? My mug broke??
BPG (Bi-Polar Guy): Yeah, like two weeks ago. But it wasn't me.
Me: And when was somebody going to tell me it broke?
BPG: When you asked about it.
Meanwhile in the background, the guy who two weeks ago told me I look much more beautiful in the barn, kept saying, It broke? Such a shame. For today's story, let's refer to him as Guy Who Needs Glasses, or GWNG for short.
BPG: It was that Hershey's one right? I guess I'll have to get you a new one.
Me: You'll have to get it from Pennsylvania because it came from Hershey's Chocolate World.
Such a shame it broke, mumbles GWNG.
GWNG: How long have you had it?
Me: I got it when I was 12 years old.
GWNG: 12 years old! Such a shame.
Me: I dog-sat a family's dog, and they brought me back the mug.
GWNG: Such a shame. 12 years old.
BPG: 12 years old, that must have been what - 8 years ago?
GWNG: 12 years old. Such a shame.
Me: You're right! It was 8 years ago.
GWNG: Such a shame.
How can I stay mad at BPG when he so sensitively guessed my age? So I guess that only means one thing - ROAD TRIP - to get a new coffee mug, of course.
And yah, by the GWNG kept mumbling such a shame, I'm guessing he knows who broke my mug and was trying to guilt the guilty party into buying me a new one, or else he's the guilty party and was just trying to throw suspicion off of himself.
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Monday, August 25, 2008
Camping, Jaj Style
So last week was my birthday, and in honor of me turning one year older...but feeling slightly less mature...Mr. Happy decided that the two of us should go on a little camping trip together.
Keeping our campsite a surprise, I was delighted to find out that we would be pitching our tent here. Mere feet away - FEET, I tell you - from this magnificent wonder of God's beautiful creation. I truly appreciate the small pleasures in life. Some good friends of ours, who make their abode not too far from where our tent was, treated us to dinner. They sure know how to make the most of a campfire!
The next day, being the anniversary of my birth and all, Mr. Happy sent me on a little adventure of my own. Thrilling and exciting does not even begin to describe my day, made even better because my good friend was able to join me. Again, it's about appreciating the little things in life. Because we had been roughing it for the past 24+ hours, Mr. Happy decided to take me out to dinner. It was not busy. In fact, I think we were the only patrons in the whole establishment, therefore our maitre d', who also served as our waiter, hung around our table...just out of eyeshot but definitely within earshot...and listened to our dinner conversation. And every time he left the room, Mr. Happy or I would sneak over to his station and help ourselves to the candy that was set out in his giant candy jar. What?! It was going to go stale if we didn't eat it! Anyway, after dinner, I enjoyed walking through the magnficent wonder that was mere feet from our campsite, and I just appreciated the beauty for all it is.
So the following day was when we had to pack up and head back home. I wanted to share the awesomeness with Mr. Happy of the magnificent wonder that was mere feet from our campsite, so that is how we spent our morning. On our way home, we stopped here, because really, it was still my birthday week. Why do the celebrations have to end just because the day has ended? Anyway, all I can say is that it's a good thing we had the pick-up truck with us.
There you have it, camping Jaj style. And I can't wait for our next trip!
Keeping our campsite a surprise, I was delighted to find out that we would be pitching our tent here. Mere feet away - FEET, I tell you - from this magnificent wonder of God's beautiful creation. I truly appreciate the small pleasures in life. Some good friends of ours, who make their abode not too far from where our tent was, treated us to dinner. They sure know how to make the most of a campfire!
The next day, being the anniversary of my birth and all, Mr. Happy sent me on a little adventure of my own. Thrilling and exciting does not even begin to describe my day, made even better because my good friend was able to join me. Again, it's about appreciating the little things in life. Because we had been roughing it for the past 24+ hours, Mr. Happy decided to take me out to dinner. It was not busy. In fact, I think we were the only patrons in the whole establishment, therefore our maitre d', who also served as our waiter, hung around our table...just out of eyeshot but definitely within earshot...and listened to our dinner conversation. And every time he left the room, Mr. Happy or I would sneak over to his station and help ourselves to the candy that was set out in his giant candy jar. What?! It was going to go stale if we didn't eat it! Anyway, after dinner, I enjoyed walking through the magnficent wonder that was mere feet from our campsite, and I just appreciated the beauty for all it is.
So the following day was when we had to pack up and head back home. I wanted to share the awesomeness with Mr. Happy of the magnificent wonder that was mere feet from our campsite, so that is how we spent our morning. On our way home, we stopped here, because really, it was still my birthday week. Why do the celebrations have to end just because the day has ended? Anyway, all I can say is that it's a good thing we had the pick-up truck with us.
There you have it, camping Jaj style. And I can't wait for our next trip!
Thursday, August 14, 2008
They All Look the Same
Today I was working at the barn. In my job, I don't have a lot of opportunity to interact with the other staff...except for Lola of course...because Lola and I are mostly in the office while the rest of them are out in the barn. But parts of my job do require me to head out into the barn, and there I see my co-workers.
I should mention that the pigs in our barn are extremely healthy, and it's because we are required to shower at the barn...before we are allowed to enter...and to shower when we leave. And healthy pigs are what our customers want. There are 4 showers (one for the ladies), so up to 4 people can shower at a time. On the inside of the barn, we are given generic t-shirts and shorts to wear; there are a couple of washers and dryers there as well, so barn clothes stay inside our securely healthy facility. Just bear with me, you needed to know this.
At the barn we have a cultural mix of people working. Three are from the Caribbean, 1 is from Mexico, 1 is from Denmark, and I'm pretty sure the rest of us are from the local area.
So.
As I was leaving this afternoon, there were 3 of us in the shower (3 separate showers, people! Get your mind out of the gutter!), and I could tell the other two were some of our Caribbean Crew (they call themselves the Caribbean Connection) because of their singing. They have the rhythm and it's really fun to watch them just break out in song wherever and whenever they feel like.
As I'm leaving the change room, I saw the other two guys in the entryway, getting ready to leave as well. The one guy looked at me and said, "Were you just in there?" I was a little confused because I've had at least 3 separate conversations with this particular fellow just this afternoon. And so I asked, "In the shower?" And he, looking confused said, "No, were you just in the barn?" And I said, "Yes."
The other guy who was with him said something, but all I caught was "Lola." Maybe they thought I was Lola??? The other guy has a very thick accent and I have a hard time understanding what he says, so I usually just laugh and nod. Mr. Happy says that he smiles and says yep, and then bangs fists with him...not really knowing what they just talked about...
So back to the first guy. He said to me,"That was you in the barn? You're much more beautiful in there."
O-kaay. Um. So have I just been complemented or insulted? I can't imagine I'm very attractive in the barn...wearing the same t-shirt and shorts that everybody else wears...with my hair flat and straight and my bangs hanging in my eyes, because unlike some former employees, I don't feel the need to blowdry and curl my hair and apply make-up before I start my shift. Anyway, it was just an odd conversation.
I guess white people do all look the same.
I should mention that the pigs in our barn are extremely healthy, and it's because we are required to shower at the barn...before we are allowed to enter...and to shower when we leave. And healthy pigs are what our customers want. There are 4 showers (one for the ladies), so up to 4 people can shower at a time. On the inside of the barn, we are given generic t-shirts and shorts to wear; there are a couple of washers and dryers there as well, so barn clothes stay inside our securely healthy facility. Just bear with me, you needed to know this.
At the barn we have a cultural mix of people working. Three are from the Caribbean, 1 is from Mexico, 1 is from Denmark, and I'm pretty sure the rest of us are from the local area.
So.
As I was leaving this afternoon, there were 3 of us in the shower (3 separate showers, people! Get your mind out of the gutter!), and I could tell the other two were some of our Caribbean Crew (they call themselves the Caribbean Connection) because of their singing. They have the rhythm and it's really fun to watch them just break out in song wherever and whenever they feel like.
As I'm leaving the change room, I saw the other two guys in the entryway, getting ready to leave as well. The one guy looked at me and said, "Were you just in there?" I was a little confused because I've had at least 3 separate conversations with this particular fellow just this afternoon. And so I asked, "In the shower?" And he, looking confused said, "No, were you just in the barn?" And I said, "Yes."
The other guy who was with him said something, but all I caught was "Lola." Maybe they thought I was Lola??? The other guy has a very thick accent and I have a hard time understanding what he says, so I usually just laugh and nod. Mr. Happy says that he smiles and says yep, and then bangs fists with him...not really knowing what they just talked about...
So back to the first guy. He said to me,"That was you in the barn? You're much more beautiful in there."
O-kaay. Um. So have I just been complemented or insulted? I can't imagine I'm very attractive in the barn...wearing the same t-shirt and shorts that everybody else wears...with my hair flat and straight and my bangs hanging in my eyes, because unlike some former employees, I don't feel the need to blowdry and curl my hair and apply make-up before I start my shift. Anyway, it was just an odd conversation.
I guess white people do all look the same.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Always Wear Clean Underwear
You know how when you were a teenager and you were just about to leave the house to go out with friends, and your mom would say to you, "Are you wearing clean underwear?" and you'd roll your eyes...much like you're doing now...and sigh and say, "Y-es!" And then your mother would say, "Because if you're in an accident you should be wearing clean underwear." And again you'd roll your eyes...(I'll let you finish)...as you left the house.
Well.
To the lady who was at Shopper's Drugmart holding up the line because she kept buying lotto tickets, PLEASE! For the love of all things chocolate! Wear some underwear!
I jest not.
She was a little large and was wearing a pair of shorts that were jogging pants material, and when she bent over and leaned against the counter, her cheek was exposed. And not the cheek attached to her face, either. I didn't know whether to laugh or throw up. A lady who was in line a few people behind me, said to her husband, "And here I thought I looked a mess coming into the store wearing this!" There was no mistaking who the comment was intended for. But the Lotto Lady was too intent on buying more tickets.
So, dear readers, if you're not going to wear clean underwear, at least wear underwear. Please. For the rest of humanity. And for those stuck behind you in line at Shoppers Drugmart.
Well.
To the lady who was at Shopper's Drugmart holding up the line because she kept buying lotto tickets, PLEASE! For the love of all things chocolate! Wear some underwear!
I jest not.
She was a little large and was wearing a pair of shorts that were jogging pants material, and when she bent over and leaned against the counter, her cheek was exposed. And not the cheek attached to her face, either. I didn't know whether to laugh or throw up. A lady who was in line a few people behind me, said to her husband, "And here I thought I looked a mess coming into the store wearing this!" There was no mistaking who the comment was intended for. But the Lotto Lady was too intent on buying more tickets.
So, dear readers, if you're not going to wear clean underwear, at least wear underwear. Please. For the rest of humanity. And for those stuck behind you in line at Shoppers Drugmart.
Monday, August 11, 2008
How To Really Tick Off Your Teenager - 101
Lesson 1 - Send him to camp. But make sure it is an over-night, week-long camp with all his buddies, filled with energetic activities where your teenager is guaranteed a maximum of 6 hours sleep each night. Give or take.
Lesson 2 - Don't make him take a nap on Sunday afternoon to catch up on his sleep.
Lesson 3 - Give him chores to do.
Lesson 4 - Give his leftover pizza pockets, which have been sitting out on the kitchen counter for 2 1/2 hours, to his little brother.
Lesson 5 - Give the easy chores that your teenager is grumbling about to his little brother, and appoint harder chores to your teenager to do. This one was his grandfather's suggestion...to give said little brother a turn to cut the grass. I didn't want you all to think that we were giving the teenager harder chores to do...such as using the push mower...because he was grumbling about cutting the grass. But now that I think about ....
Lesson 6 - Sit back and enjoy the fireworks.
Lesson 2 - Don't make him take a nap on Sunday afternoon to catch up on his sleep.
Lesson 3 - Give him chores to do.
Lesson 4 - Give his leftover pizza pockets, which have been sitting out on the kitchen counter for 2 1/2 hours, to his little brother.
Lesson 5 - Give the easy chores that your teenager is grumbling about to his little brother, and appoint harder chores to your teenager to do. This one was his grandfather's suggestion...to give said little brother a turn to cut the grass. I didn't want you all to think that we were giving the teenager harder chores to do...such as using the push mower...because he was grumbling about cutting the grass. But now that I think about ....
Lesson 6 - Sit back and enjoy the fireworks.
Close Only Counts in Grenades
So last week, Thumbelina and Shaggy were standing at the dining room window watching the lightening as a storm was moving into our area. And somehow, Thumbelina managed to knock down the curtains. And bend the rod. They were so outdated - lacy balloons with a valence. They've been in my window for 13 years. It was definitely time for a change.
And then Thumbelina said to me, "Uh-oh, what Shaggy do?" Heh. My girl already knows who to blame.
So this weekend, I patched the holes from the old curtain rod, because the new curtains I bought are not the same style, hence there is a new rod with different holes. And the white from the patching looked terrible with my green walls. I managed to find the old can of paint from when the room was painted 4 years ago...and it was solid as a rock. Rock solid. Very solid. Solid. So then I had had this brilliant plan to go through my craft paint and mix colours together to come up with the shade of green currently on my walls. I came close. Zoomer said to me, "Close only counts in grenades. And horsehoes." I wish he would have said something before I painted it.
It is hideous.
It is true - close only counts in grenades.
And then Thumbelina said to me, "Uh-oh, what Shaggy do?" Heh. My girl already knows who to blame.
So this weekend, I patched the holes from the old curtain rod, because the new curtains I bought are not the same style, hence there is a new rod with different holes. And the white from the patching looked terrible with my green walls. I managed to find the old can of paint from when the room was painted 4 years ago...and it was solid as a rock. Rock solid. Very solid. Solid. So then I had had this brilliant plan to go through my craft paint and mix colours together to come up with the shade of green currently on my walls. I came close. Zoomer said to me, "Close only counts in grenades. And horsehoes." I wish he would have said something before I painted it.
It is hideous.
It is true - close only counts in grenades.
Friday, August 08, 2008
This Child Needs More Supervision
Hey Mom! I was colouring!
Ooooh, I wonder how it got on my foot?
You have your camera? Sure, I'll say Cheese!
Hey, take a picture of my Fish Face!
I just find it all so shocking.
Ooooh, I wonder how it got on my foot?
You have your camera? Sure, I'll say Cheese!
Hey, take a picture of my Fish Face!
I just find it all so shocking.
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